It is often difficult for me to know if someone is taking advantage of giving nature. I tend to go with my heart, and let the Lord deal with dishonest or scamming people. While I am pretty good at spotting scammers online or on the telephone, it is people I am acquainted with who tend to take advantage of me, and it isn’t until i have started giving over a period that i realize something is off.
i seem to have scam meter except when it comes to people with children. I can’t allow children to suffer because I experienced the hunger and shame of poverty. However, when I went on a tour of Europe in 1997, one of the warnings from our tour guide was not to give to people in the tunnels or subways, such as in Paris. It was so hard for me, but I could see the potential danger. The same lesson saved me from being robbed when I traveled to Madrid alone the next year.
The problem for me is when people I know ask for assistance providing heat, food, or housing for their children, and I invite them to reside with us for a short while. It is the people you least expect to use you so easily, such as family and friends, but then, they are the ones who know your giving nature best and the right words to say. Just yesterday, I wrote a long email message on my church email to explain why my husband and I would not allow someone to come back and stay with us, although they are certainly in need. But once trust is broken, you hesitate to enter the fire once more to save someone.
It is a conversation for God and me. Knowing the difference between being useful and actually helping people without enabling them is difficult for me, but i am getting better at saying no, even when the situation touches my heart. Being used is such a painful thing that we put on armor afterwards that makes knowing when to help a conundrum.
Help from Heaven 
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