I am Still Here, Just a Little Off-Kilter

Ever since I had a hospital stay about three weeks ago, I have been off-kilter and unable to find my way to write or do anything constructive. I have changed the way I eat, which is difficult after 68 years of eating what I want, if not what I needed. It’s like I am in mourning for the foods I can’t have. But that sounds silly to me.

The death of my mother-in-law that occurred a couple of days before I had the episode that sent me to the emergency room, coupled with a disappointing doctor appointment last week, has sent me into a tailspin. There is something maudlin to knowing that you are now the oldest generation in the family, a knowledge that brings one’s mortality front and center.

Because of the problems with my tummy, I couldn’t go with Douglas to California for the memorial service for my mother-in-law or officiate at the wedding of one of my former students in California, an event I was truly looking forward to attending. It would have been my first time directing a wedding, and I had started to prepare for it.

I was honored that she would ask me not just to attend the wedding but actually to officiate it. It’s so wonderful when former students remember you fondly and want you to continue to be in their lives.

I plan to get back to writing my blog soon, but I seem to have writer’s block, not finding things to write about. But, I am so enjoying reading the blogs I follow. I know that dark days don’t last always, and that, with patient endurance, this, too, will pass and I will be regaling my readers with stories and poetry from the wonderful prompts made available every day.

So, yes, I am still here. Keep safe and be careful to follow guidelines by scientists and doctors, as we deal with another surge of the virus, not just in America, but also in Europe.