Broken, But Holding On to My Faith

It’s been a while, I know. But, I have been dealing with a pinched nerve in my back that makes sitting long enough to write uncomfortable. I will have surgery in June, but for now, I just decided not to let it defeat me, so I write today, and boy am I joyful to do so!

Because of the defibrillator, I couldn’t have an MRI, but I did have a CT Scan myelogram, and that was a post in itself. I wrote such a bad review on the experience on the hospital’s survey that a nursing supervisor called me to inform me that new procedures were being implemented to ensure that no one else suffered like I did. Seven attempts to install an IV and two more attempts to get blood because the first samples were contaminated in some way. Nine times stuck! My arms were black and blue and purple for three weeks or more afterwards.

But, the test showed that one of the lumbar vertabrae has collapsed altogether and is sitting on nerves, which is why I have pain running down both legs that make sitting, walking, and sleeping hard to endure. The orthopedic surgeon showed Douglas and me the pictures, and I was shocked at the extent of the deterioration of my spine. I have had back pain since I was struck so hard by a former boyfriend and landed on the hood of a car. Then, I fell off a ladder when I worked for the telephone company that put me in traction for weeks. The damage done those two times and reaching my three score and ten means a lot of problems. This will be the thrird back surgery.

I went to a chiropractor to try and avoid surgery, even though it will be minimally invasive surgery, but I was so tense at the thought of someone touching my back or adjusting it that the lady just did stretching, which I do at the gym twice a week with a personal trainer on the Silver Sneakers plan. But, to her credit, the chiropractor did tell me that after seeing the scan results that she probably couldn’t help me. I was thankful for her honesty.

I did go twice, and the second time, another lady chiropractor did not listen to me and adjusted my back from the neck down, and I left with more pain that I came with, so NEVER AGAIN! Now, I just try to walk each day for about 3-4 miles on the trail outside or on the treadmill in the gym or at home, and I do stretching exercises. Classes have ended for this academic year, and I have received my grades, so I don’t have that stress to deal with, although considering I earned an A+ for both classes this semester, my need for perfection may be the source of the stress.

But, I have tried to keep up with my blogging community, because your posts keep me encouraged and laughing and thinking of and praying for someone other than myself. I feel thankful that so many of you consider me as a friend or a Christian sister. So, I hope to start writing more, and just need to get up every 30 minutes of so to stretch and walk. It’s like losing a prt of yourself not to write.

I am also taking a course in Prophetic Preaching online from a local seminary that I probably should have taken 17 years ago when I was ordained, instead of now when I probably preach 2 or 3 times a years as a guest preacher. And, believe me, most people don’t want you to preach on social justice issues, such as climate change or race or gender issues. But, I am loving reading and writing on the discussions with other preachers who actually preach each week. What a hard job!

I hope to be able to write two or three times a week on both blogs, and to go back to writing from my beloved prompts. I have missed you guys so much! Here’s to blogging! Has the WordPress app changed, because people’s pages look different, or is it me?

7 thoughts on “Broken, But Holding On to My Faith

Add yours

  1. Regina, it was good to see that you are writing again, despite the pain. Your writing shines with your personality and is inspiring and and gives an additional dimension to my blog reading. May your surgery go well, with a quick recovery. Abundant blessings to you and Douglas.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I was surprised to see you here again and I well know of the test and back pain etc. I wish you luck with the op! The worst tests I had were EMGs. However the first one in the 80s was a lot worse than another in 2000s.

    Sent from my iPhone


    Liked by 2 people

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