Unsolicited Advice or Opinions Get My Goat

One thing that bothers me is unsolicited opinions on my behavior. Social media is packed with it, and the ability to remain anonymous has increased the rate of unsolicited opinions given in such hateful and unloving ways to people they don’t even know. I don’t like it when people think they have the right to tell me what I shouldn’t do, or what I shouldn’t wear, or what I shouldn’t like.

For example, my husband and I enjoy hiking. We love to follow paths that have not been cleared, where few have trod. There is a sense of adventure, akin to that of modern-day Lewis and Clark. Admittedly, some of the paths can be stony or full of tree roots, which could pose a danger for two 70-somethings, but we are cautious to watch our steps over such terrain.

Yet, when we meet a younger couple, their eyes open in amazement to see us, and then they ask if we need assistance or if we are lost. But you can see in their eyes that they wonder if we are crazy for taking that route at our age. I know we slow people down, and their frustration may be why they feel entitled to remind us of our ages. I always smile and thank them for their concern, rather than getting angry and asking why they think they have the right to speak to us as if we are children.

Another example is that I am a preacher. I know that in some denominations and religions, women are not allowed to preach or teach men. But I felt called to preach and went through the formalities to be ordained, so I am grateful when given the opportunity to preach. Yet, women and men feel comfortable telling me that I am sinning, because the Bible says so. If I have on a collar, I get the look that asks, “What are you playing at?” And some fearless folks just come right out and say that I am wrong, making me feel as though I am going to Hell right there on the spot. I want to repeat the words of Peter and John in Acts 5:29, “I must obey God, not human beings.” But it’s better just to let it go.

I believe we are all entitled to our opinions, and although I may disagree with what people think of my actions, I don’t argue or start lengthy theological discussions. I simply walk away when it’s in person, or don’t respond when it’s on social media. Let people live their lives, and as long as their actions don’t impede your ability to live your life, let it go. Your unsolicited opinions aren’t appreciated.

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